Bad Knees Make Boot Camp too Hard

Here's the deal: because of my knee problems, I won't be doing the boot camp. I will, however, be going to the gym that's associated with the boot camp and building up the muscles in my hips, thighs, and legs so I can support my knees. My knees were in such bad shape over the weekend, I couldn't really walk around.

Let's face it: I'm not 20 years old. I'm 51. I just couldn't keep up. I'll start at the gym on Friday. My biggest words of wisdom are don't do something that's making you feel worse. That's not the point of exercise.

And the Winner Is. . .

First of all, congratulations to the Osbornes--no not Ozzy and Sharon, at least that's what their saying--the winners of the Progresso Soup gift pack I was giving away. Yea! I hope you like it. As you remember, this prize comes directly from Progresso Soup so we'll need to send them the contact information so they can send out the prize. Be patient. It may take a couple of weeks.

Second, I did go to the gym, but I didn't do the pilatesworkout. Why? Because the class was full of young people and I felt intimidated. I did, however, walk for a little more than two miles. I like to walk. I am a little disappointed in myself for not going to pilates. But I didn't want to be the only old person in the class. Ugh. So much for all of my work on my emotions.

Well, this is going to be a long day here at work, so I better cut this short today.  More later. . . .

Shaking It Off

Back at the gym this morning. I'm starting slowly. I walked for about 20 minutes and did an elliptical for about 10 minutes. I feel better but certainly not worn out.

I have a lot of hard ahead, but I think I can muster up what it takes. I didn't think I could before. I think it takes the right frame of mind to even get motivated. If people feel weighed down by life, I don't think they can really shake it off until they have some change in the way they think—if that makes any sense at all. I guess I mean I've been letting it go.

The truth of the matter is that my life is changing dramatically. While there's too much personal stuff to discuss in an open forum, I can say that I've been forced to make some heavy decisions. I've also been forced to face some facts. Although it's been difficult, even painful, I know the decisions I've made are right. And now I feel like I can move forward.

Thank you to everyone who supplied words of hope and wisdom. It has meant a lot to me. You have no idea how much it's meant.

So He Peed on the Floor

Made it to the gym again. I've been tracking my exercise minutes on Sparkpeople. I go to the gym, then rush to work so I can add the minutes to my tally. Since I've been tracking them, I'm up to 300. Not too bad.

I've been nauseated since yesterday evening. I don't know why. I wish I could go home, but I can't. I've missed so much work already. Last evening, I just laid around. Caleb kept whining to go out. I didn't pay attention to him, so he peed on the kitchen floor. That's what I get for not listening to my pup.

I think I'm losing weight but I don't know for sure because I haven't been on the scale. I decided I don't care if I lose weight for now—I just want to get back on my feet. Even though I feel better than I have in a while, I still have days—not unlike the past two days—where I don't feel so good. So I'm not going to give myself "just one more thing" to worry about.

One of These Days

Made it to the gym again this morning. I feel more energetic. I'm still working out on the elliptical. I'm trying to work up to going to the spin class again. I will—one of these days.

Life is still full of surprises. Of course, I like good surprises better than bad ones. I'm waiting for a good one.

I wish I had some great revelations today—but I don't. I'm just working toward a better life. And I'm praying for my girls.

So the plan is to get back to they gym five days a week. Two down, three to go.

P.S. I just read a headline that said: "Baby Safe after Being Trapped in Washer." How does that happen?

Wishing on a Star

It's a new week. I made it to the gym today. I did about 40 minutes on an elliptical. I walked for about 10.

I don't eat anywhere what I used to eat. So the diet is still OK.

I'm still broke.

I still pray for divine intervention—I pray for my girls and for answers everyday.

I still wish on a star.

I still believe in miracles.

I still have faith.

So that's where my head is at.

Free Personal Training

I'm finally back in the gym—new gym and a new routine. I'm going to the University's Student Rec Center and getting free personal training. What a great benefit. 

I feel OK today, despite having been sick for the last six months. With any luck this is a trend. I still have to have a chest x-ray sometime today. And I still have that odd feeling in my chest. But I'll get better one of these days.

I'm still working on the emotional eating. And I'm getting a little better at thinking before I eat. 

So that's it for today. Sorry I don't have much to say. 

You mean I coulda been getting this for free?

I've decided I'm leaving my current gym to join the Student Rec Center at WVU. Why? Because it's cheaper, and I can get a free personal trainer. What did she say? A free personal trainer? That's right. I wish I had known this a month ago. 

Unfortunately, I have a hiatal hernia that I must have repaired—soon. But that doesn't mean I can't get my ass started. And stop paying for the other membership that I'm really not using anyway.

I want to be healthy as I enter my twilight years—I think I'm older than I am. But right now I feel older than I am.  

A sidebar, and I know you'll be really interested in my health symptoms, my hernia causes me to retain large amounts of gas that identifies itself when I take a swig of diet Coke and follow it with something the magnitude of what might come out of a frat boy at a keg party. Nice, huh?

OK. That's the bad side of the hernia. What it has done for me, though, is made me think about every piece of food I put in my mouth. If I eat too much at a time, I'm in pain for hours afterward. So I'm eating very small portions. What I have come to realize is that I ate when I wasn't even thinking about it. I would look at some food and think, "this will be good," and then eat it—maybe later I don't even remember that I did it. Now, I stop before I put it in my mouth and think about the pain I'll be in if I give into the temptation. And I'm not even sure that temptation is the right word. 

So that brings me back to using food to comfort myself. What does it do for me? Especially since it makes me feel so guilty after I do it. Why am I always on self destruct? 

So that's what I'll be thinking about this week. 

Made It Again

Made it to the gym again today. Still an abbreviated workout, but a workout nonetheless.

Light news day otherwise.

All's Quiet for Now

I made it to the gym—even though I took the scenic route. I accidentally went the way I usually go to work, which adds at least another 10 minutes to the trip. But I got there. 

I'm still thinking about the personnel training sessions. And still working on the diet. Not much else to say about that.

I had the girls all weekend and both of them ended up being sick—one on Friday night and the other on Saturday night. I'm too old to be up all night with sick kids. It's taken me three days to recover. 

I hope I can continue going to the gym bright and early. Well, we'll see what happens tomorrow. 

Still Waiting for Spring

I know. I haven't posted for a while. I haven't had Internet service at home for about two weeks. It's getting frustrating. If I had known what I know today, I never would've switched my service.

I made it to the gym four days last week, and, so far, today this week. I like working out. I'm just having a time getting out of bed. But I'm getting better.

As far as the diet, I'm trying to eat things that are good for me. I figure if I stuff myself with carrots it won't be as bad as miniature Hershey bars. Sometimes, for me anyway, it's just the act of eating something that satisfies me. I am a compulsive eater, no doubt. I'm always in the "what-can-I-eat-next" mode. So i've been going for baby carrots, grape tomatoes, and apples—things that take a while to eat and really are a source of vitamins and fiber. Don't forget fiber. Boy, that has an effect, doesn't it?

So that's where I'm at. But I'm doing OK. I feel OK. Having my girls around me helps my mood. I love them so much. Also, I'm still playing piano—well, learning to play piano. I'm getting better at that, too.

On Sunday, it was 70 degrees. Today. it's snowing. My sinuses are suffering. When will it finally be Spring?

Nothing to Say

When I woke up this morning, I couldn't believe it was Monday already. I had four days off. I used them to organize my house. I feel much better about living there now. I got some new furniture for the living room and a bed for the girls. Life is better, but I've still got a ways to go.

The girls stayed all weekend. And a good time was had by all. Ha, ha, ha.

I made it to the gym this morning. My eating binges have slowed.

Works sucks.

I think that about covers it. Sorry I haven't had much to say lately. I hope I have a lot to talk about soon, but I can't be sure.

Looking for Some Spark

On Wednesday night I have piano class. It makes for a very long day. So on Thursday, I feel like I didn't get much rest. And I got up and went to the gym.

I'm working hard to get back into a routine. I made it to the gym four times this week. I haven't gotten sick—knock on wood. But I am totally worn out today.

I have tow more personal training sessions coming up. One this coming Monday, and one the Monday after that. I'm hoping this sparks some new motivation.

I still don't have a lot to say. So. . . .

Stop. I'm Gonna Puke

You know on the Biggest Loser when people are working out so hard they puke? Well, that's what my personal training session was like this morning. I thought I was going to puke. I still feel shaky. And I scheduled another one for next Monday. What was i thinking? Oh, it's all good. I'll be glad I did it—sooner or later.

I had the girls this weekend. That was fun. We went to the mall and walked 'til out legs were stubs. They were playing with baby dolls on the way home, and Liberty—the four-year-old—was telling hers, "I love you baby. I can't hit you baby." I thought I was going to die laughing. Soon after, they fell asleep. Where do they come up with this stuff?

One time when we were in a restaurant, Liberty—the same one—was standing up on the chair. I told her to sit down, and she looks at me and announces at the top of her lungs, "You can't hit me." I was mortified. I want you to know that I have never hit her in my life. It's funny now, but at the moment, I was like, "Oh dear God, I cannot believe you just said that."

So I'm working on getting back into exercising. My goal for this week is to go the gym five mornings. After today, anything I do on my own will pale in comparison.

I Don't Feel Like I'm Having a Heart Attack

Well, I've made it to the gym two days in a row. I set up two more personal training sessions—one for next Monday and one for the following Monday. I'm going to get back into working out, even if it kills me.

I was working out on an elliptical this morning, not paying much attention to the heart rate monitor, when I look down and it says 175. I'm thinking, "That cannot possibly be right." So I took my hands off of the handles and wiped them. Grabbed them again, and the new reading was 131. OK. So I know that my heart rate didn't drop that fast in a matter of five seconds. But it scared the pee out of me for a minute—well, not literally. The monitor obviously doesn't work when your palms are sweaty. I think I would know if I were experiencing tachycardia. But you never know.

Beware if you take over-the-counter diet pills. In this article, F.D.A. Finds ‘Natural’ Diet Pills Laced With Drugs, the agency says that some of the ingredients can be deadly. So be careful.

Well, I have a lot to do today. I am hoping that I'll be writing that I made to the gym again tomorrow.

Not so Intimidated Afterall

Made it to the gym again this morning.

My diet has still been going well over the past few days. Yesterday went extremely well because I had things to occupy my thoughts besides food. I think that's what I need. I think the piano class and getting some things done around my house will help me immensely. And when the weather changes for the better, I'll be able to walk the dogs again.

I had my first piano class last night. It was fun. I'm relieved that most of the people in the class have never played the piano before. I don't feel so intimidated. The teacher is very nice, and she says that she won't make anyone play in front of the class if he or she doesn't want to. Thank God. I have some homework. We're not having class next week because the teacher has to take her mother to Texas for eye surgery. So I have time to practice. Maybe I won't feel like such a dork if I can learn how to play the scales well and get the timing down—at least a little better. My goal—I may have said this before—is to play "Linus and Lucy."

OK. So I need to get to work.

Beginning Piano Tonight

In the gym again this morning. I need to get back into this. I think if i can make it through the week, I'll be OK.

The diet has been going OK for a couple of days now.

My piano class starts tonight. I'm looking forward to it.

I don't have a lot to say today. I hope I have more tomorrow.

Make It a Habit

Where do I begin? I made it to the gym today. I kind of fell off the diet wagon over the weekend. I'm getting back to it today, though. It'll take some willpower to get through a couple of days, but then I hope to be back in the habit.

I had a dream a couple of days ago where I bought a house. I was amazed at how much potential it had. It needed some work, but I could make it into something to be proud of. I noticed that part of the house had been blocked off, and that it was burned out. A couple had once owned the house, but the man had died suddenly leaving her alone. She was so distraught by his death, that she set fire to part of the house. The house was not burned beyond repair, but it take some elbow grease to restore it.

The part of the house that was burned out was a hotel where lots of guests once spent time. Now it was closed off, only the front of the house was open, but it, too, was in need of repair. But the potential for the house was so great, I couldn't pass up the opportunity. I remember thinking that if I could get the hotel fixed up, I could earn some extra income to help me fix up the place the way I wanted it. I also remember thinking it was shame the house was burned out.

I know what this dream means.

I had another dream in which a rat had gotten into my electrical wiring, and was making things very difficult for me. It also got into the lock for my door, and would chew on the key when I tried to unlock it. The rat looked like a cartoon rat, with heavy eyebrows and beady eyes.

I think I know what this dream means, too.

So anyway, I'm getting back into my routine, I hope. Wish me luck.

Call Me

I made it to the gym today. Woo Hoo. I did 35 minutes on an elliptical. I did some stretching. I have to get back to my routine. I have a friend who is calling me in the morning to make sure I'm up. It helps because I know the phone is going to start ringing, and I'll have to get up to answer it. After one day, so far so good.

I'm making an effort to get my diet under control, too.

So we'll see how this goes.

I've Been Hijacked

This morning I read that a man used his own pay stub to write a bank robbery note on. This guy must be brilliant.

I did not go to the gym today, but I did workout at home. It was kinda hard because the rug I was standing on kept slipping. I guess I'll have to do something about that.

My computer at home has been hijacked by some sort of Trojan. A friend of mine is going to try to fix it tomorrow. But until then, I can only check e-mail and such at work.

I signed up for an adult piano class at WVU. It starts January 21 if they get enough people.

Not much else is going on. So TTFN.