Too Much Pressure Leads to Failure; Dreams Exposed

I think I have dieted myself into a place where I can't lose weight anymore. To successfully lose weight, I will have to eat minimally and exercise until sweat drips from me and I collapse. Seriously. Just dieting and walking won't work—unless I'm willing to walk six miles a day. My metabolism is shot. Part of it is thyroid. Part menopause. Part yo-yo dieting for the past 30+ years. What I need is a way to fix myself—no fads or gimmicks please. And most of all—no pressure. As soon as I put pressure on myself, it's over before it starts.

A New Section

Photo by yark64. 

A funny old saying that I always liked is: Opportunity knocks but once, but failure is always pounding away. That makes me laugh. And that brings to me a new section I like to call: Things I've Always Wanted to Do But Couldn't Figure Out How to Make Happen. 

Photo by Salem Elizabeth.

You know what I've always wanted? To be a farmer. You know have some cows and horses to take care of. That would make my life. It just would. Please don't tell me how much work it is to work a farm. I grew up on a farm. I know. OK? I know it means long days filled with lots of work. But it's good work—getting back to the land kind of work. And just take a look at these pictures. I mean really. How could you pass up such a life? Well, everyone has their own wishes and wants. So I can't expect everyone to agree with my dream. But this is my dream. To retire, buy a farm along with some cows and horses, and live the rest of my life in my own bliss. Happiness. That's what it's all about, right?

Happiness. Bliss. Being in the moment. Living in God's world in harmony with nature. That's my dream.

When I look at these pictures, it makes that dream that much more intense.

Anyway, that's what I'm sharing today. And it's kind of uncharacteristic for my put it out there like that. Because this is a real dream. I'm always afraid people will mock me when I'm absolutely honest. No one wants their dreams ridiculed. But I'm opening up a new side of me.


Someone told me, you have to say your dreams out loud for them to come true. So there's my dream. My wish.

More from the deepest recesses of my soul. . . .
Last night I dreamed I was a wedding planner. What? OK. Let's take a look at this from another point of view. What does a wedding planner do? Helps people plan one of the biggest life changing events that will ever come to pass in their lives. A wedding is a joining of two people (or two things, whatever they may be)—a commitment, a bond, a promise.

So what does that mean to me? Planning a life altering event that requires a commitment. Is it just losing weight? Or is it more? I think it's much more.

This Blog
I started this blog in September of 2006. I've had varying degrees of success. Right now I'm considering whether I want to keep this blog up. Or start a new blog that allows me to talk about more than the trials and tribulations of weight loss. Or maybe just change this blog altogether. Change the name. Change the focus. Or keep this blog and start a new one, too. Anyway, that's a struggle.

OK. I've said more today than I've said in a long time.